You know one thing I’ve seen several colleagues do throughout the years that makes no damn sense? Give up their vacation days! So, most of you in Corporate are probably familiar with the term “use it or lose it” as it relates to Paid Time Off. This essentially means that you are required to carry a balance of no more than x hours of PTO at any given time. Thus, if you have more that the allotted amount, you will end up forfeiting those hours.
You may as well be returning a portion of your paycheck to the company. How crazy is that? Why?!
I know a few close African friends who feel guilty and undeserving when they take time off, perpetually waiting for “the best time when things calm down at work”. Let me tell you what I tell them. There is never a perfect time. Trust me, the building will not burn down if you take a few days for yourself. And if waiting for the best time means giving those days back…not worth it.
I value every single day of PTO just as much as I value my pay check.
While I enjoy travel, I have actually come to appreciate and prefer the beauty of a well-planned staycation.
For one, you save some coins and you spend way less time prepping and stressing as you would planning a vacation.
3 weeks ago, I took 5 days off and staycationed, coming back feeling more recharged and reset than I have ever felt on any vacation. Here is how I spent my time:
Still on Hidden Figures and the moments that had me squirming in my seat, sighing deeply, or straight bawling my eyes out…
Yesterday’s Wooden Door is Today’s Glass Ceiling
A few days ago, a girlfriend of mine called me, completely distraught. She has been working on a difficult work project for months and just as she was finally approaching a note-worthy breakthrough, a senior leader took the project and assigned it to someone else. She felt disregarded, invisible, unimportant. How many of us have felt this way in the workplace at least once? You work hard on something only to have it snatched from you in the moment of glory. Kat must have felt the same heartbreak each time she was asked to work behind the scenes only to have a White, male counterpart take credit. In the final scenes of the movie, she solves a complicated and life-altering problem, and as soon as she communicates the solution, the door is shut in her face. Literally. She is shut out from seeing the fruits of her labor. She is shut out from the glory and recognition.
I saw Hidden Figures on MLK day. I haven’t written in a while but I couldn’t stay away after watching this film. I don’t recall any movie ever touching me quite this way. My only regret was having to watch it in a theater full of old, White folks who annoyed me with every exclamation. Like, honestly, why are you collectively gasping at the sight of the “Colored Only” coffee pot or bathroom? This wasn’t that long ago…you were an adult then.
I felt so much during and after this movie and I couldn’t wait to come home and share. Given how rich this film is, I will share my thoughts over the next couple of parts to do it justice. Btw, Spoiler Alert!
Did you see the Grammys last night? I did. I rarely watch award shows, or TV in general for that matter. However I happened to be at the boyfriend’s last night and we ended up watching it.
So…Kendrick Lamar. Kendrick Kendrick Kendrick! My mind is so blown, I am not sure where to start. That performance stole the entire show! His spirit, his fire, his lyrical talent, his artistic vision, his message! I was so proud to be Black in that moment. Throughout his entire performance, I was completely enthralled, not caring who else was in the room and what they were thinking or experiencing. Not caring if his passion and directness made anyone uncomfortable. It was for me. He was…
If you’ve read my last few posts, you may have noticed that I am a few months in with a new employer. As I’m sure you know, there are definitely challenges and growing pains that come along with any major transition. Mine has not been easy but I’m making it work.
My new role involves being a senior team member with the responsibility of helping to develop an up and coming team. One of the team members is a young woman; smart, personable. She was very welcoming of me to the team and she frequently expressed her gratitude for “having someone she could learn and grow from.” Over the last few months, we have developed an informal, but close mentoring relationship where I not only coach her through specific job tasks, but her career overall. This excites me! I have struggled to find my path in the Corporate world, wondering if there is a way for my double consciousness to intersect seamlessly. I know now that whatever I end up doing will involve coaching and mentoring young Professional women.
If you know anything about growing up in an African, ultra-Christian home, then you know a bit about how I was raised. I, like most of you, was brought up by family members who believed humility and gratitude were the most extolled virtues. It’s hard to disagree when you think of how many chapters in the Bible are dedicated to this ideology.
“Blessed are the meek…”
“In all things, give thanks…”
Where religion leaves off, conventional African wisdom picks up with sayings like…
“Pride goes before a fall…”
“The fool speaks, the wise man listens…”
“Pride is the mother of arrogance…”, etc again teaching us, from a very young age how far we can get in life simply by being humble and meek.
So it suffices to say that I grew up with these values ‘beaten’ (literally, albeit lovingly) into my subconscious.
As a young adult entering into the Corporate American landscape, I struggled with balancing these values long inculcated in me, with the new Corporate values of self promotion, i.e., speaking highly of one’s self and achievements. I had a difficult time talking about or taking credit for good work I had done.